You taught them what?

1st grader

Dear, Korean parents,

If your child grows up to be a:

      • survivalist
      • virologist
      • videogame maker
      • horror movie director
      • bad-ass zombie killer

I take all the credit (especially if they are a bad-ass zombie killer!). For the past year you have left your children with me for hours and I filled their minds with visions of rotting flesh, weapons, and survival. I have taken every opportunity to make sure they know which weapons they will need, the best plan of attack and retreat, and the various kinds of zombies.

Occasionally I switched things up and used examples of falling to their death from a  snow covered mountain, and other times I talked about chocolate puppies with laser beams invading the planet, but mostly it was zombies, lots and lots of zombies. Have you heard of the TV show The Walking Dead? You probably should check it out, your kids have.  Do you kids ever sneak around a corner and jump out at you with a baseball bat or some other random item that could be used as a weapon? It’s all about survival. Has your daughter or son ever tried to engage you in conversation about the ZT-5 virus or the upcoming zombie apocalypse? Don’t bother searching the Internet, they don’t exist… yet.

I have had an awesome time teaching and preparing them for their future. I thank you and one day the world will thank you.

Kindest Regards,

Christene (Zombie Teacher) Lewis


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